Tying Life Together

Oh where, oh where should I start?

I think I said something like - "We need an offer. We need a miracle." It was April 2006 and my condo had been on the market for two month. Now remember this is back in the day when two months was a LONG time for a place to be on the market. Back when homes were selling in the blink of an eye. Not too long after I said that I checked my e-mail. OMG! I didn't believe my eyes. There was an e-mail waiting from someone who had seen the condo just a few days prior. They were making me an offer. (I swear on the bible this is how it all went down.)

At the beginning of the month I talked about the things I wanted for my birthday that couldn't be wrapped. The things that would be left of up to time and faith - and G-d. Well, two of those things are marked off the list. My friend is cancer free as of this past week. Also, my other friend's husband got a job offer and is looking at getting another one soon. So, not one, but two so he'll have choices. I couldn't be happier for both of them. Now that only leaves the things for me. There are three things specifically that I want that can't be bought. Maybe if I make the proclamations out loud then the miracle that occurred back then will happen again.

Last week, my mom was obsessing that I need a new winter coat. Now mind you, my mom believes that I need to get a down coat for when it's super freaking cold (she has been hounding me about this for a few winters now). Maybe she's right about the down coat, but I don't feel like getting one. As for getting a new winter coat all together, I informed her that I had a decent coat that I got two years ago and that the one she saw me in was only out because it's not THAT cold out yet. This whole winter coat thing ended with her telling me that she was going to buy me a new winter coat for my birthday. I told her there was no need for that.

The questions regarding birthday presents has gone from "What would you like?" to "What yarn shop would you like a gift certificate from?" No answer has been given on my part. Though when I finally do cave it will be down to two places.

I'm enjoying the calm before the storm. Staring next weekend thing will be crazy here and it won't slow down for about a week and a half. It's all good crazy, but still crazy. I need to appreciate the calm before the storm.

It's kind of fitting to say - the calm before the storm starts next week with all the change I am experiencing. I have to say I'm scared. I have been for some time, but I haven't said it out loud - at least not to many people - let alone publish it publicly on this blog. What scares me the most about the way I feel is that it's a calm scared, not a panicked scared like I'm use to feeling. Though I do get a rush of panic from time-to-time. Maybe that means I've made peace with all that is going on, I don't know. It just bothers me more than I like to admit.

Admitting how I feel is part of my tying up loose ends initiative. I guess you can say there is something freeing about it. As for the rest of my loose ends. . . I'm gettin' there. Slowly, but surely. I'm still on the fences about some of the larger ends hanging out there. When the time is right, I'll know what to do.

Until later . . .